December 30, 2009

I Started Playing Dragon's Age video game

This was an email I wrote Susan talking about me playing the video game Dragon's Age.  Warning this is a spoiler!

I started playing Dragon's Age tonight and it took me one hour and 58 minutes to get started, plus a hour and a half fighting Playstation Network(which sucks balls).  OMG this game is epic in depth.  I created a poor dwarf (which his height blows me).  The local crime boss has my sister and me under wraps.  I'm his flunky and he's pimping my sister.  he is forcing my sister to whore herself to give a nobleman a child.  Only the noble's children are able to fight in the war with evil which we are losing.  the underground people live in this a strict caste system. you are what your parent and grandfathers were.  we are poor and had no caste, so that's I am a criminal who works for the crime boss.  While walking the streets people are so nasty to me, and talk down to me.  My mom in the game is a drunk bitch and she is so mean and negative, I can't fuck with her but I guess that comes living as an outcast.  However my sister is so nice and dwarf pretty (think porn star Pinky lol).

I want to save her from being a noble whore.  There a lot of options available, I can be nice, a complete dick, or a lame yes man.  My sister confesses she met a nobleman but didn't want to tell the crime boss. in talking with my sister I find out there is only two ways to raise my family from being outcasts.  one, she has child with a nobleman and he adds our family to his or, two, I do the impossible and go above ground save the race and comeback a legend like only one other person in dwarf history.

Well the boss sends me on mission to see if a guy is stealing, I tried being nice and it didn't work then I threaten to kill him and plant evidence and he fessed up.  He had a side job sale some expensive rock up to above ground humans.  He tried to make a deal with me to not kill him for stealing from the boss, he give us a cut.  I half agree and this shocks the dude the boss sent with me to do the job, I tell him we can split the money, he becomes cool with it. Then I think about it and if the boss finds out that A. we kept the money he will kill us and B. if don't kill this guy he will kill us.  So I decide to kill the guy who was stealing, we take the stolen goods back to the boss.  But I only gave the boss half and pocketed the other half.  There is so many options in this game.

The next job is to rig this local fight put on for an above ground legendary battle called Grey Wardens.  They are looking for a new member and the winner of the fight tournament gets a shot.  Boss man placed a ton of money on this underdog fighter to win.  He task me and my boy to go drug the other fighter so dude can win.  We get there I met the human guy from the Grey Wardens and start acting like a 8 yr old meeting Kobe Bryant.  Dude was real nice to me and didn't treat me like the scum of the other like the dwarfs do.  I lose my wording and he walks away.

We find the bum we are suppose to help win and he is passed out drunk before the fight.  So to save everyone's ass I dress up in the dude's armor and cover my face to pretend I am him.  I have the option to have my boy go drug the guy I am fighting but I decline, say I want to prove myself to the Grey Wardens...even though I can never show my true self because as a no-caste I'm not suppose be in the building and much less fight in a noble event. So I fight and win. and then wins some more all in mask.  then right before the championship is awarded this drunk fool comes out talk about I got his armor in the middle of the arena.  Why didn't my boy hold him back I don't know.  The Dwarf king gets upset and asks me to remove my mask, I refuse at first then the guards come and I do to the horror to everyone but the Grey Warden.  I get jumped by guards and locked up.  The Bossman pulls some strings to get me transfered from the jail to locked up in his hideout just so he can kill me himself instead of the guards who want to kill me for breaking the caste system.  Bossman wants me and my boy dead because we can finger him for rigging the fight.

There is a dumb guard watching us, I trick him into coming close and pick pocket him for the key.  my criminal background pays off.  I break me and homie out and fight our way to the bossman in his hideout.  I kill the boss, who was hard for me because I just started the game and still learning how to play and was only level one.  Soon as we step outside, the king and guards are waiting for us to lock us up for escaping.  I tell them I kill the crime boss, but it still didn't matter to the king because I broke the caste system laws.  The Grey Warden is impressed with my skill and will and offers me a job and protection from the king.  It's my only option verse death.  If I leave the Grey Warden side the guards will jump me.  I am forced to leave home.  My sister is there after the Grey Warden found her.  I ask if she will be ok and she said she found a nobleman to take of her.  I ask if she is sure, I still don't like the baby machine idea.  She says she will be proud to have a child that will raise the family and one day go fight for the race.  So I leave my family and people behind to join the Grey Wardens in the war with evil.  Ok only 98 more hours left.

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